Life in my walk

As I stepped out onto the street in front of the house this morning, I had this strong urge to turn left instead of following the road that was in front of me.  I don't normally take that route, because if I did, at the beginning of my walk would be a very steep incline.  The steepest during the whole walk and that's not the way I wanted to start out my morning.  I actually just wanted to stay in bed and sleep the day away, but I got out and turned left and headed up this very steep hill.  As I started out, my thoughts kept turning to the events that had occurred this week and I felt heart sick and sad all over again.  I hadn't gone very far from the house, when a huge buck bounded out of the woods in front of me and stopped for a second and watched me as I watched him and then he ran across the road and back into the woods.  It was at that time, that I took a good look around me and saw what a beautiful morning it was and also saw this daunting hill in front of me.  This hill is a good half mile long and a sharp incline.  I kept walking and as I did, it's as if God was walking beside me and telling me that he would show me some things on my walk that were so similar to life and that we would start out this lesson on this hill.  He showed me that climbing this hill is a lot like the hills we climb in our life, but when we get to the top, there is such wonderful rewards, as long as we keep climbing.  I kept climbing...

Getting to the top of this part of my walk, I then turned left again and walked down a gutted dirt road that is used very little by one of the local oil companies.  My first obstacle came into site.  I deep rutted part of the road that seems to be always filled with murky water.  The road (ruts) had a very narrow path on both sides that had very large thorn bushes hanging over the path I needed to take.  It's always a challenge getting past this part of the road without getting snared up in the thorns.  God pointed out that this obstacle and getting caught up in the thorns were a lot like struggles we go through to get to the top of our hills in life.  We can keep going and we don't have to get caught up in the thorns of our life.  I kept climbing...

The incline the rest of the way up to the top of this hill wasn't as steep and along both sides of the path were different kinds of beautiful wild flowers and it was as if I could hear God say, there is always beauty in your struggles, if you will only look. Raise your head up and look.  I kept climbing...

Upon reaching the top of the hill, it opens into a clearing that over looked a pasture down bellow on one side and was surrounded by Pine trees on the other sides.  There lies the remains of the oil companies old tanks also.  I stood over looking the pasture and listened to the quiet.  I realized that I could hear in the distance a cow and a rooster and also could hear a little further off, traffic on the highway.  I could hear birds all around me and I closed my eyes and just stood there for a couple of minutes and listened.  And God said, that's the sounds of life, for life will and must always go on, even during your struggles.  But I had reached the top and found such a wonderful view and the peace and calm was a salve to my open wounds.  God pointed out that I have many hills to climb and that there will be joy and wonderful rewards at the end of each.  I walked on...

The path going down the hill on the other side is strewn with rocks and deep ruts from oil trucks coming and going and gets quit narrow in places.  Further on up the path it's also torn up and scarred and has fallen trees all around on both sides and you can see big gaps in the forest where the loggers have been recently.  The gaps allow rays of sun to reach the forest floor were it didn't use to be able to.  Walking through there and seeing the sun shinning through was so beautiful and peaceful.  And God said, see how My light shines through the scars in the path.  This is like the scars in your life and My light shining through you.  I walked on...

I then came to the county road and turned left.  It runs along beside the pasture that I normally walk by in the mornings.  At this point, I'm about two miles from the house and as I walked on there was a flock of ducks in formation flying over head.  I watched for a few minutes until they were out of site.  I then caught a glimpse of my shadow on the road as I walked and watched the shadow me pick up her feet and keep moving on.  God said your time here is like that shadow and like the ducks flying in the air; very fleeting.  Just stay the course, stay in formation and follow the path.  I walked on...

I was almost back to the house when I felt this strong conviction to turn around and go back in the direction I had come from.  I looked heavenward and said, "are you sure" and then I sighed, turned around and I walked on...

God said, grief and life is like that for many.  Sometimes a person will be so close to their destination and healing when they turn around and end up walking the same path of hurt over again.   But sometimes a person must rewalk their path of grief in order to heal.  For with every trip across that path a person can get stronger.  God also showed me that sometimes when we have been hurt or have hurt someone, then the way to mend that hurt is to turn around and go back to the time of hurt and make amends.  I asked God if there was anything that he wasn't going to show me on this walk and he said... Walk on. 

I was following the county road back the way I had come.  I had started walking faster and in a hurry to get to my destination, due to normal personal necessities.  I hadn't had my coffee yet.  While walking, I looked across the pasture and could almost make out the roof of the house.  I thought about taking a shortcut across the pasture in order to get back to the house sooner.  I heard God say, if you always take the shortcuts, how much of life would you miss.  God has a plan on this walk so I stayed on the path.  I walked on...

While walking on the county road, there are a lot of very sharp turns and a few hills that are just high enough that a person cant see over them.  It makes for an interesting walk when there's cars coming and going.  I'm always listening for vehicles and sometimes the wind can sound like a car coming.  I'm very cautious as I continue to walk, but today for some reason, I was more so.  As I was walking I started thinking about what could happen if I didn't pay attention.  We never know what is over a hill or around a turn on any road or in our life.  God showed me that if I don't keep going over those hills or around those turns because of fear, then I may miss out on something extraordinary in my life.  I walked on...

I was about a half a mile from the oil company road when I spotted something white laying in the dirt next to the road.  It was a stoneware plate and I thought about just continuing my walk and not giving it any thought.  But God had other plans for that plate.  I picked it up and looked at it.  Not a scratch or chip on the plate anywhere, so I decided to carry it with me.   By the time I got to the dirt road that lead back to the house the plate had gotten heavy and I had decided that I would lean it up next to the fence and leave it.  God said no, carry it.  I kept carrying it and as I did my hand cramped and I would transfer it to the other hand.  God said, that plate is like the many burdens that people carry.  See how it hurts you, but your unwilling to put it down now.  Me and my plate walked on...

At one point I was thirsty and had to hug the plate close to me with one arm in order to take a drink from my bottle of water with my other hand.  God said, isn't that what many people do with their burdens.  They keep them close and hug them and nurture them, instead of placing them where they need to go.  As my hands began to cramp and I struggled to carry the plate... I walked on...

I finally came to the part of the path that had the huge trench and puddle and very narrow space to get around on both sides.  I stood there and looked at it for a second and then chose a side and went on.  I took the plate and used it to press the thorn bushes away from the path so I could get around.  God said, isn't that what some people do with their burdens.  They carry them and use them to get around other struggles in life in order to avoid situations that may cause future pain.  Some people carry their burdens and don't let go in order to gain sympathy from others.  Me and my plate walked on...

I was almost to the turn that would start me on the steep descent back to the house.  I knew I would be passing one of the neighbors homes there and I got to thinking how stupid I looked carrying this plate (my burden) while on my walk and that if they saw me, they would surely think I was crazy.  I thought, I'll just put it in my jacket while passing their house.  God said, how many people hide their burdens the same way you plan on hiding your plate.  They hide the hurt and pain instead of seeking help and guidance from those who have gone on before them.  They put on a false front that is presentable and pleasing to the world instead of dealing with their burdens the way it should be dealt with.  I walked on and started the descent down the hill.  Me and my plate...

I could see the house and knew that the journey with my plate was almost over.  I was hoping that no one was awake so I could just take the plate inside, wash it and put it away, but that wasn't to be the case.  So I walked into the house and did with my plate (my burden) what we should all do.  I walked up to my father and handed him the plate and said, "I'm giving you my burden, because I've been carrying it for too long", then I turned and walked away.   I'm sure he didn't get the symbolic meaning of what I had just done.  But I gave it to my father and when I had come back a little while later, he had taken it and washed it and made it clean. 

I walked 1 hour and 50 minutes and went 4.22 miles... and a lifetime. 

Penny Myers